It happened again… another family told me their story of working through the ramifications of a kinship adoption, bringing a troubled child of a troubled relative into their home and their lives, including their faith community. But, when this troubled child began to act out at home and at church, and the family contacted the leadership of this faith community, instead of acceptance and help they were met with fear and judgment. As the mother related to me, “When I called asking for support and they finally learned the extent of our child’s issues, we were asked to not come back.”
Let that sink in for a moment…
A Christian couple answers the call to care for a child who has endured more than most of us could imagine–cares for the orphan that James suggests is the mark of “pure and faultless religion”–and their church turns them out.
The message is clear–get your messy situation cleaned up, and then you can come back. I think Jesus might have a word or two for the church as we address our unwillingness or unpreparedness to the “messy” children in our communities…
“A certain man was preparing a great banquet and invited many guests…” starts the Parable of the Great Banquet, found in Luke’s gospel, chapter 14, verses 15 to 24. Interestingly, Jesus was at a banquet at a religious leader’s home when he gave this parable. A similar setting today might be if your pastor had a large summer picnic at his or her home after service, and all the church members were invited.
Jesus was telling this story, in this way, in the setting of a party at a religious leaders home to make a point: while God invites everyone to the party, we have a tendency to invite a more selective group. This is the primary reason I have chosen to name this blog “Full house with ACEs.” Yes, there is the pithy (hopefully memorable?) play on words that reference a pretty good hand in poker. But, more importantly, I believe that God’s house isn’t full until all those God has invited, including those with adverse childhood experiences, are part of the community of faith!
“Then the master told his servant, ‘Go out to the roads and country lanes and compel them to come in, so that my house will be full.‘” (verse 23)
The word “compel,” suggests that those who were not originally included in the party invitation needed to be convinced that they actually were welcome… and, importantly… welcome as guests, not as a token of charity. They were to be honored just as the guests who declined their invitations would have been welcomed and honored. By their inclusion in the party, they went from outcasts defined by their impairments–crippled, blind, poor, and lame–to those honored by the One throwing the party.
This is the last point I would like to make. I think that the church desperately NEEDS those who have ACEs (adverse childhood experiences) to be part of the fellowship of the faithful. Those who have been deeply wounded not only need the grace of God in profound ways, they also express the love and grace of God in profound ways! In the church, God’s “house,” we can easily get distracted by issues and matters of relatively minor importance. We need members and worshippers that know the power of the good news of Jesus Christ to overcome all manners of adversity.
A full house with ACEs… would you consider your place of worship to be holding such a winning hand?
originally posted to www.fullhousewithaces.com (c) Chaplain Chris Haughee
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