Deconstructing abusive behavior

"How are behaviors actually formed? How specifically are violent behaviors formed? How are they maintained and then how are they changed?....What…does the research actually show….Most behaviors, you may be surprised to know, are largely modeled. In other words, unconsciously copied. Copied, imitated, followed. And this is very efficient. It’s because this avoids in evolution the need for an instruction book on almost everything we do. We can look to those who are a little bit older who are around us, what they are doing, and just follow. But we don’t actually do this consciously and say ‘okay, that’s what they’re doing I’m going to do it.’ It’s actually neurologically programmed into something that's called mirror neurons which are circuits that both observe and act. And it’s unconscious and it’s invisible and we model most of what we do. And then what locks it in is something that’s called ‘social pressure.’ And so we continue to watch and see what we think other people think we’re supposed to do. And that becomes, and the research is very strong on this, the principle driver. So the principle driver of violent [abusive] behavior actually is whether you think that someone in your peer group expects it of you. Which you don’t actually think through but you’re afraid to disobey that norm."--Dr. Gary Slutkin ( 5:15-7:00 mins. in).  See "Disrupting Violence" video post: http://bit.ly/zpE7e2