By Sue Ryan, Resource Center on Domestic Violence: Child Protection and Custody, May 6, 2020
During the month of May, we celebrate Mother’s Day, acknowledging our mothers and all they give each day. Mother’s Day is a reminder of the importance of family and healthy relationships. Each family is unique, but the common hope is love.
Societal and community definitions of gender roles place enormous expectations on mothers: to be nurturing, self-sacrificing, and relentlessly giving. Sometimes the actual mother gets lost in these expectations. Mothers are expected to give, even at the cost of their own health and peace. Despite the personal cost, most mothers do just that: give and give. It is this generosity of spirit that we celebrate on Mother’s Day.
As we recognize mothers, it is important to note the weight of unforgiving gender roles and the impact that they have on our families and relationships. Unhealthy gender roles create inequitable and harmful relationships. Ideas regarding the role of women as submissive to men, the societal privilege men experience which is best exemplified in inequities in pay, the often accepted belief that women are less than men, and, within a family, must obey men, all serve to reinforce harmful gender roles and toxic masculinity.
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