Oprah's Receives Cecil B. DeMille Award & Talks Race, Class, Power & #MeToo Movement

Christine Cissy White 1/7/188:36 PM

In case you missed Orpah's powerful, moving, and emotional speech or want to watch it fifty-nine more times.... here you go. The first clip, from a fast-moving YouTuber who got it online quickly, is about Oprah receiving the Cecil B. DeMille Award. The second is from her acceptance speech.

Celebrating Oprah

Oprah's Acceptance Speech

Here's more about Recy Taylor who Oprah talks about in her speech.

Here's more about the #MeToo Movement founder, Tarana Burke.

Here's @Jane Ellen Stevens essay entitled, "We can't stop sex harassment by firing or incarcerating our way out; we can stop it by using ACEs science."

And here's an op-ed based on that essay that's in the Jan. 8 edition of the San Jose Mercury News:

Opinion: What to do with harassers outed by #MeToo? Can't throw 'em all in jail

And writing by and about @Louise Godbold.

Things have changed. Things are changing. Not all things and not everything. I know. But it's important to celebrate what we can when we can. There's less silence tonight. More listening. More believing. That matters.

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Former Member

Whatever you do, I implore you to work to take on the CSA in Hollywood and Politics too and to take on the CSA of boys who also suffer.

And remember, wars, unjust wars like the Iraq war and the evil war in Libya where Africans are now sold in open air markets, brings sexual abuse, children conscripted as child soldiers, human trafficking for sex, labor and organs. Let’s not forget the need to be steadfast against unjust and inhumane wars.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/a...-auctions/index.html

https://vimeo.com/142444429

https://m.facebook.com/AnOpenSecretDoc/

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Id-C7Lu-G7M

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=n_xhb7wjvcg

https://disobedientmedia.com/2...trafficking-network/

https://disobedientmedia.com/2...media-covered-it-up/

1/15/185:22 PM

Christine Cissy WhiteIt's not trauma-informed unless it's informed by trauma survivors.

Dana Brown posted:
Lou: YES! Let's co-create the healing platform and movement for #MeToo and CSA. Thank you for your leadership, Louise! Thank you for your courage!
Cis: Bless you for sharing Anonymous' comments. Admiring her brave sentiments shared, may she feel uplifted knowing she is heard and knowing her courage to speak out is on behalf of literally thousands suffering in silence.
Grateful for our ACEs Connection community being such a brave and safe space, I'm so humbled to be learning from, and sharing with others. My own sexual assault journey (the first rape was at 16 and when I screamed for help, they came, turned on the lights, and watched him finish) has been wrought with shame, blame, hopelessness, vile anger. Even now, writing these words decades later, I'm having a visceral reaction with tears streaming as I hold these emotions and KNOW the vast majority of humanity understand the pain, anguish, and healing journey.
The grace of our healing journey is with each other. The wisest person is the one who has traveled the road ahead. Experiences bring us wisdom.
I'm so grateful for each of you, our members on ACEs Connection, for our courage to share, our bravery to heal, our Love and Light we experience together. Our collective wisdom.

Dana:

I am so GRATEFUL for you and astounded by you and furious for what happened to you. And YOU are a wise leader who remains so loving. It's literally amazing.

This should be a motto for all who work with survivors of all kinds of ACEs and trauma.

"The wisest person is the one who has traveled the road ahead. Experiences bring us wisdom."

I think this is central and obvious and often forgotten. Sometimes it's an afterthought or not done at all - why I think parenting with ACEs work must be led by those parenting with ACEs). Anyhow, we so need each other in every part of this work and we can learn from each other and from the experiences we don't share as well as the ones we do. But to heal, at least in the beginning, I believe we need to be in community with those who get it viscerally, intellectually, emotionally and experientially who share from that place, speaking with and to instead of at and for. And that those wise ones must be more than tokens at policy and program levels for systemic change.

Things are really changing and that is so encouraging. I'm going to give you the hugest hug when I see you!
As you say, in gratitude! Cissy

1/15/187:20 AM

Louise GodboldMember

Wow, Dana! Talk about courage. That's incredibly brave of you to share your story. I am so appalled and incensed that this happened to you. For years, the power was in the hands of your rapist and 'non-protecting bystanders' - now you have seized it back for yourself. Good for you! When the light is turned on the cockroaches scatter.

1/14/1810:50 AM

Dana Brown (PACEs Connection Staff)Staff

Lou: YES! Let's co-create the healing platform and movement for #MeToo and CSA. Thank you for your leadership, Louise! Thank you for your courage!

Cis: Bless you for sharing Anonymous' comments. Admiring her brave sentiments shared, may she feel uplifted knowing she is heard and knowing her courage to speak out is on behalf of literally thousands suffering in silence.

Grateful for our ACEs Connection community being such a brave and safe space, I'm so humbled to be learning from, and sharing with others. My own sexual assault journey (the first rape was at 16 and when I screamed for help, they came, turned on the lights, and watched him finish) has been wrought with shame, blame, hopelessness, vile anger. Even now, writing these words decades later, I'm having a visceral reaction with tears streaming as I hold these emotions and KNOW the vast majority of humanity understand the pain, anguish, and healing journey.

The grace of our healing journey is with each other. The wisest person is the one who has traveled the road ahead. Experiences bring us wisdom.

I'm so grateful for each of you, our members on ACEs Connection, for our courage to share, our bravery to heal, our Love and Light we experience together. Our collective wisdom.

1/14/1810:37 AM

Louise GodboldMember

This WILL happen, Cissy! We will create a #MeToo specifically for those who are bound by the silence, fear and conditioning of childhood sexual abuse. I have a call with the organizers of the #HealMeToo campaign next week and I'm talking with the other HW survivors (we call ourselves the 'Persisterhood') since many were wanting to discuss next steps. I will keep you and everyone else on this thread updated. There will be no more silence. There will be no more fear. Let's do this!

1/14/189:25 AM

Christine Cissy WhiteIt's not trauma-informed unless it's informed by trauma survivors.

I'm posting this for someone who wrote me via email and asked me to share anonymously. It's not what we normally do on ACEs Connection but I think for this particular comment it's o.k.

Comment from Anonymous:

"I am continuing to talk to people about ACEs and resilience and everyone is enthusiastic about working within a trauma-informed framework. That energizes me!

I'm also incredibly moved by what's happening on acesconnection. I just went to the conversation about #MeToo for CSA survivors determined to post something in support. I couldn't do it. Too much programming around "Don't Tell! to work through. Lots of therapy! But I will share with you- MeToo! I was sexually abused for my entire childhood and then paralyzed by sexual harassment that derailed my career.

Writing that took incredible courage! Are you able to pass that along anonymously? I'd like to share my support somehow. If not, I understand."

I've responded privately to "anonymous" and can't stop thinking about this email, these words, her losses and experiences. This email is huge and honest and emotional. I'm dizzy from the seismic shift of all the #MeToo's. I still can't find my words or thoughts and am heavy with grief/relief and questions about if/when how people tell and heal and where we all go now and next. I'm grateful for this email and this community. Cis

P.S. @Louise Godbold & @Dana Brown (PACEs Connection Staff)

1/13/184:24 PM

Former Member

#NoMoreWar so we have the money to #SaveChip

1/10/181:12 PM

Christine Cissy WhiteIt's not trauma-informed unless it's informed by trauma survivors.

Hi Tina:

I heard Meryl Streep being criticised as well because many feel she did/could/should have known. I think it's fair to ask that question or any other thing rises up.

For those of us with an abuse history, we've often been told "I didn't know," by people (maybe by parents) as though that is any comfort, as though, to be a child in a family where no one knows is much comfort, or to be a child in pain or in such danger and have no one notice signs or impact, etc. is a pass or a relief or makes us understand more or feel better, etc.

But we're having these conversations on a site with 20,000 people and people all over are having conversations we've not had before like who is responsible for keeping people safe and isn't that all of us? I mean, that's pretty big stuff and it's rare and new and I'm encouraged. But encouraged doesn't mean there's not more to do and that there's not a lot of pain from years and careers and times where speaking up wasn't responded to with a standing ovation and maybe, in fact, it causes real and legit losses or personal or professional harm because yeah... lots of us have lots of that. And that's going to keep being true for many in many places.

Anyhow, I DO feel Oprah has used her power for good in the TV shows where she spoke about being abused, in the shows she's had with male survivors on her network, with the leaders and speakers she's helped become more mainstream, by all female produced and directed TV shows, by having more people of color as stars and dealing with major social issues on popular TV. And that doesn't mean I think she or anyone is perfect or that I get all her decisions, choices, etc. But I don't even get all of my own choices, decisions, etc. yet

I think she does and did know that abuse was/is rampant and was doing more than most anyone else has/does while also surviving, healing and building a life (and a BIG career). It's hard to be a survivor and deal with that and life. It's hard as kids. It's hard as adults whether we are public or private by choice or circumstance or career. Many of us have no role models who guide us in being public or professional survivors and doing the rest of life while dealing with how people react to that, in the now, when it was so silenced, shamed, not seen in the past.

I know I need a lot of growth and grace all of the time for myself and for others. I still have a lot of hurt and reactions to news, facts, tone, and "Oh, now people will talk and this is trendy?" stuff that comes up in me that I don't always know what to do with. So, thanks for saying what's coming up for you. I think these back and forth conversations are part of what healing is about. We aren't carrying it all alone, in silence, in secret. That feels REALLY different, though not always REALLY fabulous. I know I feel like I've got an unasked for p/t job or processing old stuff mixed with news that is about topics that are not at all new. The only new part is people listening, hearing, caring, reporting, etc. and that can bring up lots for lots of us. So, while I don't have the same reactions as you I do have my own set of reactions and stuff I'm still sorting through.

Thanks for sharing what's true for you. Cis

1/10/187:41 AM

Former Member

I feel like an alien here. But I am gonna be brave and stand my ground. I know that you all know Ms. Winfrey has been in this business for decades - since my childhood and I’m quite old now. She knows how things work in Hollywood. She is one of the power players. I cannot believe she didn’t know what was going on. You move up in these circles by playing the game. If you are like me with a big mouth and question, you don’t, but you get to keep your integrity. I believe Oprah was fully aware of the abuse in Hollywood. I believe she is also fully aware of the rapacious and depraved child sexual abuse that occurs there as well. In my opinion if she were as brave and courageous as she attempts to portray herself as, she would have been speaking out about these abuses decades ago. She definitely would have been speaking out about the child sexual abuse that is rampant there. Have any of you see the well sourced documentary “An Open Secret?” A brave woman, especially one who was abused as a child herself would have used her power to bring light to the plight of child actors. She has either turned to the dark side where some things must be overlooked to succeed or she is writhing inside with incongruence and contradiction. Real feminists, powerful women protect the children. However, protecting the children would detract from the political narrative of #MeToo.

1/9/1810:30 PM

Louise GodboldMember

Christine Cissy White posted:
Louise, Dana, Jane, ACEs Community:
Excited and have some ideas, lessons learned from other campaigns. Once we hear more of your thoughts Louise, maybe we can put a schedule together for regular Zoom (or something) meetings to keep this going/moving? DELIGHTED! Cissy

Fantastic! Ladies let's do this. I would very much like to put my thoughts on paper and share with the ACESConnection community. Then let's have an initial meeting and discuss next steps. I am excited to see what we can achieve as a community, particularly as there is strength in the fact we have a common language, vision and purpose.

Lou

1/9/184:29 PM

Christine Cissy WhiteIt's not trauma-informed unless it's informed by trauma survivors.

Louise Godbold posted:
Dana Brown posted:
Honoring our wonderful Lou Godbold, let's lift up her vision of creating a #MeToo movement which includes survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
Lou, please know we look forward to hearing your heart and thoughts on moving forward. This will be one of the most critically imperative movements of the decade and absolutely - 2018.
As we speak, millions are suffering - many in silence. Children, teenagers, young adults, adults, seniors are screaming inside that silence. A shift we can all choose, today, is ensuring when we speak of #MeToo, we're articulating sexual abuse - at any age.

Dana, Cissy, let's do this! I spoke to Jane about it yesterday. I don't know how to start, just that we should. I plan to write a blog to involve the whole ACESConnection community, but please PM me if you have some ideas.

Louise, Dana, Jane, ACEs Community:

Excited and have some ideas, lessons learned from other campaigns. Once we hear more of your thoughts Louise, maybe we can put a schedule together for regular Zoom (or something) meetings to keep this going/moving? DELIGHTED! Cissy

1/9/188:41 AM

Louise GodboldMember

Dana Brown posted:
Honoring our wonderful Lou Godbold, let's lift up her vision of creating a #MeToo movement which includes survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
Lou, please know we look forward to hearing your heart and thoughts on moving forward. This will be one of the most critically imperative movements of the decade and absolutely - 2018.
As we speak, millions are suffering - many in silence. Children, teenagers, young adults, adults, seniors are screaming inside that silence. A shift we can all choose, today, is ensuring when we speak of #MeToo, we're articulating sexual abuse - at any age.

Dana, Cissy, let's do this! I spoke to Jane about it yesterday. I don't know how to start, just that we should. I plan to write a blog to involve the whole ACESConnection community, but please PM me if you have some ideas.

1/9/188:14 AM

Dana Brown (PACEs Connection Staff)Staff

Honoring our wonderful Lou Godbold, let's lift up her vision of creating a #MeToo movement which includes survivors of childhood sexual abuse.

Lou, please know we look forward to hearing your heart and thoughts on moving forward. This will be one of the most critically imperative movements of the decade and absolutely - 2018.

As we speak, millions are suffering - many in silence. Children, teenagers, young adults, adults, seniors are screaming inside that silence. A shift we can all choose, today, is ensuring when we speak of #MeToo, we're articulating sexual abuse - at any age.

(Comment above from Louise Godbold)

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1/9/188:10 AM

Christine Cissy WhiteIt's not trauma-informed unless it's informed by trauma survivors.

Dear Everyone:

It really is just amazing, inspiring. I love how intersectional Oprah's speech is and that it was delivered to MANY standing ovations and to such a mainstream audience... YES!!!! Dana: The idea of a campaign survivors of childhood sexual abuse. speaks to me as well. I feel like that has been touched upon and included in #MeToo to some extent with a lot of strong language about believing and supporting survivors and with the work the founder has been doing for a decade plus outside of Hollywood.

But, there's more to do and more connecting with ACEs to be done - always.

But what a moment and time we are in. Cissy

1/9/185:14 AM

Laurie UdeskyMember

I just had the chance to listen to Oprah's speech. Totally floored, really powerful. Brought tears to my eyes. Thanks Cissy for sharing!

1/8/186:53 PM

Dana Brown (PACEs Connection Staff)Staff

Lou: my heart aches for what you've endured with #MeToo - and knowing you've endured CSA - please know you are wrapped in the unconditionally loving wings of Angels (Human and Etheric). You are so loved, by all of us... We are here - and we hear! I love you Louise Godbold.

Yes! please know thousands will support your vision of igniting #MeToo with CSA.

1/8/185:17 PM

Laura PinheyMember

Now I see what all the fuss has been about. I'm a believer!

Also, in a speech that was all standout, this really stood out to me: "Speaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have."

1/8/181:42 PM

Louise GodboldMember

Dana Brown posted:
Cissy: Thank you so much for posting these! Watching the Golden Globes last night, specifically because I heard there was solidarity with women wearing black in support of #MeToo, I was moved to tears with several acceptance speeches and Oprah's was the epitome. You could literally feel the shift of the tectonic plates releasing blame, shame, fear, pain as the seismic shift unfolds. I cannot imagine one viewer not being impacted.
Lou: I'm profoundly grateful you received the call following and the guy will be supporting you with the media!! You must have slept peacefully knowing you can now fully be embraced on your healing journey as you ignite change for others' healing journeys.
2018 is the year...

Beautifully said, Dana. I want to create a #MeToo movement for survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Your words echoed in my head as I walked to work today - releasing blame, shame, fear and pain. This is what needs to happen for CSA survivors too. But first I have to tell my mother... Just haven't been able to do that. Speaking more and more publically about it, it's as if a part of me is forcing me to tell her.

1/8/1810:00 AM

Christine Cissy WhiteIt's not trauma-informed unless it's informed by trauma survivors.

Louise Godbold posted:
I'm pleased to report, Cissy, that after Oprah's speech the guy who could corroborate my story and has been holding back called me and agreed to speak to the media. I told him he is on the right side of history! Finally, I feel like I can own what happened to me. That's why in our trainings now I emphasize that the first thing you should say to any sexual assault survivor is "I believe you."

Louise: That's a wonderful update. I'm so glad. You've been through so much and I appreciate your sharing so many aspects of the process with us all, including going public and all that's required in needing to be corroborated, validated, believed. The way the system works need so much improvement. I'm happy for you now but it must have been so painful/re-traumatizing to have to wait on this for it to be considered real. Ugh... Thank you so much for sharing and all the work you've done and do. Cis

1/8/189:41 AM

Dana Brown (PACEs Connection Staff)Staff

Cissy: Thank you so much for posting these! Watching the Golden Globes last night, specifically because I heard there was solidarity with women wearing black in support of #MeToo, I was moved to tears with several acceptance speeches and Oprah's was the epitome. You could literally feel the shift of the tectonic plates releasing blame, shame, fear, pain as the seismic shift unfolds. I cannot imagine one viewer not being impacted.

Lou: I'm profoundly grateful you received the call following and the guy will be supporting you with the media!! You must have slept peacefully knowing you can now fully be embraced on your healing journey as you ignite change for others' healing journeys.

2018 is the year...

1/8/188:57 AM

Jane StevensPublisher, ACEsTooHigh; founder, PACEs Connection

That's SUCH great news, Lou!! I'm so glad!!

1/8/188:27 AM

Louise GodboldMember

I'm pleased to report, Cissy, that after Oprah's speech the guy who could corroborate my story and has been holding back called me and agreed to speak to the media. I told him he is on the right side of history! Finally, I feel like I can own what happened to me. That's why in our trainings now I emphasize that the first thing you should say to any sexual assault survivor is "I believe you."

1/8/187:38 AM

Jane StevensPublisher, ACEsTooHigh; founder, PACEs Connection

Whoa. Thanks for posting this, Cissy. I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face. She said it RIGHT!!!!

1/7/189:03 PM

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