STEINER: My secret was, that I had this gun loaded with hollow point bullets pointed at my head by the man who I thought was my soul mate many, many times. The man who I loved more than anybody on earth held a gun to my head and threatened to kill me more times than I can even remember.
RAZ: But in the beginning, you had no idea he would turn violent.
STEINER: Right. His behavior showed no anger or even frustration. He was very sweet and thoughtful and gentle for almost the first two years of our relationship....
STEINER: Why did I stay? The answer is easy. I didn't know he was abusing me. Even though he held loaded guns to my head, pushed me downstairs, threatened to kill our dog, pulled the key out of the car ignition as I drove down the highway, poured coffee grinds on my head as I dressed for a job interview, I never once thought of myself as a battered wife....
"The other question everybody asks is, why doesn't she just leave? To me, this is the saddest and most painful question that people ask because we victims know something you usually don't. Over 70 percent of domestic violence murders happen after the victim has ended the relationship, after she's gotten out, because then the abuser has nothing left to lose...."
http://www.npr.org/2013/04/12/175617775/why-don-t-domestic-violence-victims-leave
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