What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “barbershop”? Whatever that word is I want you to keep it in the back of your mind as you’re reading this.
For me, the first word that comes to mind is healing. I’m sure many of you are reading this thinking “you are so far off from what a barbershop is”, but before you completely write it off let me explain.
As someone raised within an urban community, I can tell you 90% of barbershops are owned by African American, Puerto Rican or Dominican men. On any given day, as you’re passing through most areas you’ll see clientele flood the seats; and in many cases they’re chattering away. I’m sure you’re starting to ask yourself “Why does this matter?” or “How does this even relate to your initial question?” I’ll tell you why and how, it matters because MALES ARE TALKING! Those young older and in between are actually speaking. It may sound pointless to most, but the reality is a dynamic aspect.
Many Black and Brown males in underprivileged communities have long suffered the consequences of not talking. With limited access to resources and outlets, suppressing thoughts, feelings and emotions have generated an overwhelming stigma.
From very young ages they’ve been told “boys don’t cry”, “stop acting like a little girl” or the most common “man up!” Men were never allowed to truly feel, process, acknowledge or express emotions; and because of this many men struggle with communicating and connecting, but there is something about the barbershop. Something that makes them want to blurt out their life problems and leave it all on the floor next to the trimmed hair. That one thing is very simple, it’s a safe place.
According to an article written by Warren Clarke and Nadine Powell:
“Barbershop Talks is meant to engage the community to talk, but also to encourage people to listen to one another and to raise awareness from within the Black community about the negative perceptions that work against Black men and boys” -Barbershop Talks: A safe place to discuss Black masculinity
There are so many expectations of what society tells boys and men they should be; or what they should do. Suppress and not discuss. Protect and provide; and not show weakness. We have to ask ourselves, who protects the protector? Who rallies behind Black and Brown boys to embrace their emotions; and stand strong in who they are?
The barbers. The community. The random older gentlemen who sit out front and talk about “the good ole days”.
When you create more safe places like the barbershop more Black and Brown men and boys will continue to talk. Continue to encourage. Continue to become resilient!
These are the type of safe places that we need to encourage and uplift all people. To teach people they are not broken.
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