Middle school hurt. Social intimidation, academic challenges and parental pressures all set against the backdrop of swirling hormones and my personal penchant for worry. Around age 12, my anxiety really took flight and started to knock the wind right out of me — literally. The smallest challenges sparked internal firestorms of thoughts that manifested in stomachaches, crying, and often shortness of breath. My parents tried to cleave me from the throes of panic with consistent love and reassurance, but to no avail. As I grew, so too did their feelings of helplessness. Not wanting them (or me) to suffer any further, I enacted a plan. I asked myself what a Jedi would do in this situation. The answer was obvious: use the Force to build a protective shield.
That bomb went off at age 25. Mired in a messy relationship, I hit rock bottom. Panic attacks, anxiety and fear were untethered and came roaring back. I sought therapy, and with this blessing the trajectory of my life changed. I learned to focus inward, and for the first time in years I allowed all of my feelings — light and dark — to surface without judgment. In doing so, I finally unearthed the true secret of the Jedi: mindfulness.
4 Jedi Mind(fulness) Tricks to Help an Anxious Child:
1. Define the “Force.”
Very plainly, The Force = The Power of Emotions
2. Wave hello to the Dark Side.
If your child feels anxious, the way around the discomfort is straight through it. We must teach our children not to deny, avoid or squash parts of their emotional experience. Long-term avoidance of emotions can actually spark and perpetuate depression, anxiety and substance abuse. When we choose not to face our worry, we are left much like Darth Vader, enslaved by our pain.
3. Lean into the Dark Side.
Anxiety activates the sympathetic nervous system, and as such, feelings of worry are often felt in such places as the stomach, chest and throat. Breathing with visualization can calm the nervous system and begin to kick a child’s logical brain back into gear.
4. Put the Light Saber down.
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