Growing up in today's world is NOT easy. I have heard hundreds of students tell me this. Despite this fact, many of them have also told me that many of the adults in their lives don't seem to understand this, including parents, teachers, and society. Adults who are disconnected from the reality of the lives of the youth that they are around will not be able to completely understand how to provide the support that might be needed for those youth needing it most.
I recently met a young woman who has more responsibilities at home than the average student. Her dad is no longer in the picture and mom works many, many hours to provide for her family. This girl has been charged with the responsibility of caring for her 3 younger siblings when mom isn't there. Her mom leaves very early in the morning for her job. This student has the responsibility of getting her siblings up in the morning, fed, and to school on time. Despite her best efforts, this means that SHE is late to her 1st hour class most days, always by just 2 or 3 minutes. You see...she is in the building on time...she is just making sure that her younger siblings get to their lockers and class before the bell. In the chaos that her home has become, she has taken on the role of providing consistent expectations for her younger sisters and brother. She is providing the support they need to be successful in the morning while she is receiving none. The adults in her school didn't understand this.
Up until recently, her school's response has been to record her "tardies" and assign detention when there are too many of them. The expectation is that every student gets to class on time, and they are just trying holding her accountable, but there were several problems with this approach in her situation. First, she is not in complete control of the reason why she is late, and with her family's situation, it is unlikely that this will change any time soon. This is something her school will need to accept, as they will not be able to change it. Second, the punishment given will not ever completely solve the problem of this young woman being late. She has always served her detention without ever complaining, as she is a responsible, respectful person.
Again, up until recently this has been the cycle. Tardies lead to detention and the cycle repeats itself over and over. Fortunately, someone recently recognized that the cycle wasn't going to be broken with this approach, so another solution is now being tried out to provide this girl the support she needs to be successful in getting to 1st hour on time. Now when she gets to school with her younger siblings, an adult (already there to work with students before school) meets them at the front door and makes sure her sisters and brother get to their lockers and classrooms on time. This frees up those precious few minutes before school for her to take care of herself and get to class on time.
This new approach has only become possible because someone realized they didn't know the whole story and they took the time to ask questions. Her school has learned how to accept a situation that they can't change, and work on ways to focus their energy on what they can change...their response. This allowed the adults in her life to be more understanding of her situation and better able to identify ways to wrap support around her, therefore allowing her to find the success she and her teachers have been looking for.
Jim Parry
REACH Stewartville Program Coordinator
Stewartville High School and Middle School
"They're all great kids; some just don't know it yet."
For more information about REACH Stewartville:
Email: james.parry@ssdtigers.org
www.facebook.com/reachstewartville
REACH Stewartville Lessons and Resources Public Share Document
https://docs.google.com/docume...BG0/edit?usp=sharing
REACH MISSION STATEMENT: Growing up in today’s world is not easy. The mission of the REACH Program is to make meaningful connections with our students who need support. Our aim is to educate the “whole student” and to help them become the best person they can be through Relationships, Education, Accountability, Character, and Hard work. The personal/emotional needs of our students must be met first so they can find the academic success they are looking for. The tools we use are personal connections, individual support, and patience.
Who’s in REACH? Students who have/had the following concerns:
- Academic struggles
- Attendance or behavioral concerns
- Mental health concerns
- ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences)
- Poor social skills
- Personal concerns / “Drama 101”
- “Unmet needs”
What we do
- Make personal connections
- Character education
- Relationship building
- Advocating for our students and the REACH Stewartville Program
- Academic support
- Goal setting/evaluation
- Grade/missing assignment checks
- Attendance/behavior checks
- Service learning projects
- Backpack Program provides food for students in need for over the weekends
- “The REACH Room” gives basic living necessities for all students in need at SHS/SMS
- Saturday School
- Home visits
- Home-bound education
- Credit recovery program support
- Personal improvement activities (such as self-defense)
- Assistance with job and college applications
- Helping students plan for their future
- Public speaking about REACH, ACEs, and Trauma-Informed/Responsive Education
- “This Week in REACH” email is sent out to all SHS/SMS staff as well as students and their families.
- Social media - all character lessons and resources are shared with students and their families as well as educators and others across the country through www.facebook.com/reachstewartville and Twitter: @REACHStewie
- Encourage other intervention programs to come visit REACH to learn more about what we do and advise about program implementation at their schools
- Model unconditional love, and listen without passing judgment
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