Rachel Yehuda was interviewed by Krista Tippett last year and that entire On Being show was fabulous and worth listening to.
This part below talks about the way we might talk about depression with our children.
DR. YEHUDA: Exactly, and I think if we know what's going on in our bodies, then it just takes a lot of the confusion and the panic away from it, especially if we have this idea that this is a step on the way to having an equilibration of some sort.
MS. TIPPETT: Does what you're learning also hold for parents who, let's say — I'll just be personal here — I've struggled with depression at times and I think when you have something like that, of course we know that genetically there can be predispositions for these things. But it also feels like it's in this category of something that you worry about passing onto your children in every possible way. I mean, I don't know, I'm just — and that depression does — can feel like a form of trauma in its way.
DR. YEHUDA: Oh, absolutely. Depression is horrible.
MS. TIPPETT: Yeah.
DR. YEHUDA: And it does pass to children. But I think one of the things that can be very empowering is to pass along coping strategies. Instead of saying things like, “Well I have depression, but that can never happen to you.”
MS. TIPPETT: [laughs] Yeah.
DR. YEHUDA: You say things like, “I worry sometimes that you might get scared when you're down.” And when I'm down, it's awful. But I can reflect back on it and know it's an illness.
Or something that can be, again, a tool. So the worst thing that you can probably do when you have depression is to not name it. And to make a lot of attributions that are not valid about your character [laughs] or...
MS. TIPPETT: Yeah.
DR. YEHUDA: ...about other things or that you're not trying hard enough. The thing to do when you feel your depression is what you would do when you feel any illness, and that is have it treated. And of course, not every illness is treated very easily. But you deal with it for what it is. So, teaching somebody how they might deal with something that you might pass on is probably the thing that I would recommend.
*What do others think about how to talk about depression or anxiety or post-traumatic stress with our children?
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