HI Melissa:
I know it's WAY late and I apologize for not seeing your question earlier! While I don't favor screening of parents I'm all for sharing surveys with parents. I don't favor screening til the medical, insurance, and screening places doing screenings have addressed race, gender, class, disability, homophobia and basically all kinds of bias since we know those most impacted most with most risks for ACE-associated issues are poor, female, LBGTQ, of color, and struggling with emotional and physical issues. The people most impacted most by ACEs are ones least likely to be treated with equity, justice, and compassion and so for me, the risks of labeling don't outweigh the benefits when I think all the benefits can be gained just by sharing info. about ACEs, healing, and how and where parents can get more support for symptoms, struggles, and causes of adult trauma, stress, and strain.
But I always share the questions, the info. and surveys when I've presented. I say "You might think about your score, your parents, how your child might score, or how a partner might score." Or you might want to look at it and not tally your own score.
For me, I find it useful as well for a conversation such as, "How many of us even knew these things are considered trauma in childhood?" For some of it, we just considered it childhood and some of it was routine for us and generations of family so that alone can be a conversation. I know I didn't consider all the ACEs to be traumatic well into my 40's and would have said just physical and sexual abuse are traumatic for many years of my life. Even witnessing domestic violence, or having involvement with child protective services, or being abused in first three years, pre-memory, I didn't always know "counted" in terms of impact on my own or others body, brain, nervous system, life and fears and abilities related to parenting.
Also, I love sharing clips from Donna Jackson Nakazawa or some quotes from Dr. Claudia Gold, which are educational but also compassionate towards parents, and ultimately hopeful.
I know there are lots of different opinions and many feel it's "triggering" to bring up ACEs, but I find silence and avoidance far more triggering. For those of us with lots of ACEs, it's not like the impacts aren't already present in our lives at time, having some place for contextualizing them can be powerful and it doesn't have to be an extremely intense conversation. I think just saying, "We'll be talking about hard experiences in childhood and if that's not something you want to think about right now, please take a break or feel free to doodle and not take this test." But, often, these are the topics being talked about and discussed in one form or another and parents, if there's safety, are often eager to share.
But I do think open ended questions like, "What's most surprising?" or "Did you know this?" or "How does this impact you?" For some, I think it's validating and empowering and for others it feels scary and daunting. I think addressing that and sharing that and honoring that it's all of that, and ultimately powerful and hopeful, and daunting, as we have SO MUCH impact as parents.
Again, I apologize for not responding sooner @McKinley McPheeters! Please feel free, as well, to share any questions or thoughts as a blog post as well as an ask-the community question. It's SUCH a good and important question!!!
Cissy
