*Written by Joanie Lane and reprinted with the author's permission
Monday Morning Insights-Re-wiring the Depressed Brain
I know what it’s like to walk through the entire day (and dreams at night) in a state of depression. Not the “oh woe is me, things aren’t going my way” or “my heart is broken” depression. But clinical depression that won’t go away.
Sometimes I give myself the “pep-talk”. “You’re okay, you can get through this. Do your exercises, smile, smile, smile, breathe, meditate,....Get some work done, ‘you’ll feel better if you accomplish something’. Eat healthy food, don’t forget to drink lots of water,....” All these things help but it’s still there, lingering in the background, following me around, stalking me, waiting to consume me.
I’ve taken medication and gone to therapy and all that “normal” stuff. But long term, adding a Meditation Practice has been the ONLY thing that helps. It re-wires the brain. Yes. It does. And by comparison I am light-years ahead of the depression that I was stuck in 30 years ago. All due to having a meditation practice.
At some point during my daily boxing match with depression I came to understand that through mindfulness I did have some choices. I could choose to accept the lie that I wasn’t enough and do nothing, allowing the depression to consume me and swallow me up in its dark vast abyss. Or, I could stick with my practice and find my way out of the darkness.
The change came when I intentionally decided to look at the possibility that maybe I am enough. And I realized something. I AM ENOUGH. Just as I am, I am perfect, and I can get even better.
But I don’t want to think of myself as an on-going project, or a developing masterpiece. I AM a masterpiece. And like a beautiful painting I may need my frame dusted, or the wall I hang on might need to be painted, or maybe I occasionally need a touch up here and there,... but the truth is I AM A MASTERPIECE. Just as we all are. Even though sometimes our true selves may be hidden under layers of grime that life has deposited on us.
Insight meditation has helped me tremendously. Curiously looking at my views and opinions on life. - “Maybe I can see another view from a different angle. Where did the tarnish come from that hides the sparkle of my silver lining? Are the problems of the outside world getting to me? If so, what positive or constructive action can I take to change that?”
I am not suggesting you introduce a chatter of thoughts into your meditation, though that often happens all on its own. I am suggesting that when an awareness of an emotion comes up in meditation you may want to open up to it with a curious mind instead of pushing it away.
Curiosity and an open heart are the key elements to unraveling an understanding of our deeply rooted emotions. And these deeply rooted emotions can trigger bouts of depression.
Adding a Meditation Practice to our daily schedule helps us view our lives with more clarity, exposing the truths and eliminating the illusions and stories we tell ourselves. And I don’t know about you, but I can deal with a truth much easier than I can a lie.
*Joanie Lane lives Lake County California and is the Director and a Teacher at "A Positive Light" Center for Spiritual Awakening. For more information visit www.apositivelight.com or her blog Joanielane.com
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