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In the face of trauma, Cissy took back her power by actively ‘stalking’ joy (www.smh.com.au) & note

 

Evelyn Lewin, a writer for the Sunday Morning Herald in Australia reached out to me last month to write a story about my stalking joy practice.

When I told her that I'm not naturally joyful or joy-filled person, thanks to developmental trauma and the impact of ACEs, and how it's a practice I've only come to in the last few several years, I wasn't sure she'd write the story.

I was afraid she might not find it (or me) lighthearted enough, might be disappointed that trauma is the back story, or not want to know I'm now living with terminal, incurable cancer (though I'm not out of treatments and clinical trials to try). Plus, I told her my practice isn't really new it's just that similar practices like self-care  seemed like too much like spa days or spending money, gratitude sounded too remote or academic, and counting blessings struck me as something for people more religious than me. I told her joy stalking felt like a simple shift I could make because it's accessible, affordable, and appealing and can be done without me changing my life, personality or vocabulary or parting with a lot of cash.

Lewin did write the story and a few excerpts are below. If it makes you or anyone else try a stalking joy practice as a way to savor more of life's sweetness, that's thrilling to me.   

Cissy White had a horrific start to life. The American author and blogger at Heal Write Now was sexually and physically abused as a child and developed post-traumatic stress disorder. As a result, she experienced flashbacks as an adult in which she felt “stalked by fear”.

Seven years ago, she was also stalked by an ex-boyfriend. Terrified, Cissy longed for a way to counter the fear that engulfed her. That’s when she was struck by an idea: she wanted to be as “ferocious and fierce” as her stalker – but in a quest for joy. So she became a self-proclaimed “joy stalker”.

“It was taking the power back out of that word stalking, which was a negative, and making it into something really positive,” she says.

It’s been a huge mental shift for the 54-year-old, who says that as a trauma survivor she used to see fear and danger everywhere. Negative feelings saturated her, while positive ones used to slide right off. Since becoming a joy stalker, Cissy not only appreciates the joy in her life, she allows it to permeate.

To read the rest of Evelyn Lewin's story in the Sunday Morning Herald, go here.

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