Tagged With "caring parents"
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The Books That Helped Me Transition from Trauma to Triumph: A Book Review Series - "Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life"
Learning to find my gifts within my chaos has changed everything. Everything.
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The implicit bias of, “Mental Illness” and “mentally ill”, a lexicon of hurt.
How can we heal from the implicit bias of “ Mental Illness ” and “ mentally ill ”? I hear these words and it sounds like fingernails scraping down the chalkboard. “ The stain of dehumanization colors the mind, body and spirit and it is not so easily washed away.” - Michael Skinner Recently I read a blog post at the ACEsConnection website, “Erasing My ACES” by Sirena Wheeler. It was posted on April, 19, 2020. It struck a chord with me, many in fact and it put me on a spiral down memory lane.
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The implicit bias of, “Mental Illness” and “mentally ill”, a lexicon of hurt.
How can we heal from the implicit bias of “ Mental Illness ” and “ mentally ill ”? I hear these words and it sounds like fingernails scraping down the chalkboard. “ The stain of dehumanization colors the mind, body and spirit and it is not so easily washed away.” - Michael Skinner Recently I read a blog post at the ACEsConnection website, “Erasing My ACES” by Sirena Wheeler. It was posted on April, 19, 2020. It struck a chord with me, many in fact and it put me on a spiral down memory lane.
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The Many Faces of Grief
“…Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding…. And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life, your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy; much of your pain is self-chosen. It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self….” – From The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran There are many kinds of loss that we can encounter in life. However, losses surrounding addiction can be particularly confusing; they tend...
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The Surviving Spirit Newsletter November 2019
Hi Folks, The latest edition of the Surviving Spirit Newsletter is posted at the website - http://newsletters.survivingspirit.com/index.php http://newsletters.survivingspirit.com/pdfs/2019-11-The_Surviving_Spirit_Newsletter_November_2019.pdf To sign up for an e-mail copy, please write to me @ mikeskinner@comcast.net or sign up @ Website via Contact Us, Thanks! Michael. Healing the Heart Through the Creative Arts, Education & Advocacy Hope, Healing & Help for Trauma, Abuse &...
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Trauma-Informed Resources Available During COVID-19 Quarantine (www.attachmenttraumanetwork.org)
Cissy's Note: We're not alone and organizations like the Attachment Trauma Network are summarizing resources and offerings and remembering the entire school community - including parents. Below, there's an excerpt from a recent blog post with resources. Also, per Julie Beem, the Executive Director of the Trauma Attachment Network, (she's smart, kind, and wonderful), more resources will be coming this week and next. And they will be shared here as soon as they are available. While these...
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Wellness and Resiliency Toolkit for Kids with Trauma
I'm excited to share a booklet created for youth in Oregon foster care at a Wellness camp this summer. Youth were provided with these quick, easy and effective (and evidence based) "Mindful Moments" exercises in their Wellness Toolkits and they were practiced throughout the day at camp so that they could be remembered in times of stress and dysregulation. The exercised are designed to quickly bring them back to a state of calm. The youth really enjoyed them, and found them easy and...
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When Hidden Grief Gets Triggered During COVID-19 Confinement
first published by The Meadows 4/15/20 Our sense of loss during the current COVID-19 crisis can trigger hidden emotions from when we experienced a sense of loss before. Whatever early losses you have had in your life — whether they be your own divorce, your parents, or both, or the abandonment of one parent, a childhood or parental illness or death, financial upheaval, constant moving around, or growing up with parental addiction or adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) — they are likely to...
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3 Ways Healthy Relationships Help Heal Trauma
Healthy relationships matter, especially when it comes to healing from trauma. Asking for help can be difficult for everyone. It can be especially difficult for those who have survived trauma. Through therapy, it’s possible to realize that you do truly deserve deep relationships as you grow and evolve through life—in the good times and the hard times.
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75 Calm Down Strategies for Kids
I came across this webpage and wanted to share with my parent and caregiver small groups. My intern typed it up into a handout. Feel free to share.
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ACEs Connection's Inclusion Tool makes sure nobody's left out
We developed ACEs Connection's Diversity, Equity & Inclusion Tool — called the Inclusion Tool, for short — to ensure that ACEs initiatives across the world focus on being inclusive when forming a steering committee, recruiting leaders, providing education about ACEs science, recruiting members, or providing resources and services within their communities. The more inclusive your ACEs initiative is, the more diverse it will be, giving your initiative a real shot at achieving equity and...
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Cancer as a survivor
Many people use the phrase CPTSD to stand for PTSD from complex trauma. To me, C-PTSD means cancer and PTSD. I have cancer and I’m a trauma survivor. I’m a survivor with cancer but not yet a cancer survivor. Will I be a survivor squared?
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Cultivating Deliberate Resilience During the Coronavirus Disease 2019 Pandemic [jamanetwork.com]
By Abby R. Rosenberg, JAMA Pediatrics, April 14, 2020 Coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) is affecting our health care community in unprecedented ways. As a pediatric oncologist who studies resilience in the context of illness, I started thinking about what this pandemic means for our professional resilience a few weeks ago, when the first US patient with fatal COVID-19 died in my home city of Seattle, Washington. Promoting resilience among health care workers and organizations starts with...
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Defining Resilience: Nature or Nurture? [thriveglobal.com]
By Ben Saravia, Thrive Global, August 5, 2019 We all know them, and history is littered with them. People, be they friends, family or colleagues, who seem so able to rise above whatever life may throw at them. Not only do they seem to take adversity in their stride, but when they are set back, they have an ability to quickly ‘bounce back’ – and may even grow from the event. Perhaps they are just lucky? Or is it a skill? How come they seem so resilient? The American Psychological Association...
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Education resources, including mental health, for kids, families during coronavirus pandemic
We have an abundance of helpful links and posts swirling online to support families and school systems as we adjust to our new normal of learning while self-isolating at home. Thousands of free academic resources from the NYT student writing prompts, to the Anti-Racist, Anti-Oppressive Homeschool Resource list, to this excellent collection from BuzzFeed, and the ever-growing crowd-sourced collection aptly named Amazing Educational Resources are being shared. Our schools do so much more than...
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Erasing My ACES
Why I hid ACES from my medical records in order to receive equal treatment.
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Fuzzy Slippers: How Do Self-Care as a Trauma Survivor
When I recommend the need for self-care to trauma survivors, they say it can feel like a chore. Some of them even roll their eyes and tell me, “You mean you want me to take care of myself? Ugh. Who has time for that?!” It’s tempting for any person to undervalue self-care. But for trauma survivors, resistance to self-care has much deeper roots. Healing takes a focused, gentle approach. Self-Care as a Practice of Welcoming Your Needs Many trauma survivors learned to do without self-care...
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Helping Families Stay Regulated during a Pandemic
As our communities struggle to do what is needed to keep people safe and families work to find a new a “normal” while caring for and educating children at home full time – it can be a lot to handle. Child psychologist and trauma expert, Dr. Bruce Perry offered 8 tips for helping children stay regulated in this recent article from Psychology Today . Dr. Perry was also a part of this video resource for parents, Staying sane while Parenting with Shelter-in-Place! For service providers who would...
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How Making Music Can Help Students Cope with Trauma [KQED News]
By Juli Fraga, MindShift Podcast, KQED News, July 15, 2019 Studies about the Ten Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) have shown that most people have experienced one of these traumas in childhood, such as being abused, having a parent who is incarcerated, experiencing homelessness, among others. The trauma one experiences in childhood can affect adult mental and physical health in later years, especially if a person has multiple ACEs. While the harm can have lasting impacts, health...
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Inside the ACE Score Strengths Limitations and Misapplications with Dr. Robert Anda (www.YouTube.com) & Note
Cissy's note: Thanks to @Elizabeth Perry for flagging me and letting me know about this important YouTube video posted on April 6th via the ACE Interface Laura Porter channel which furthers this important discussion about the uses/misuses of ACEs scores. This topic is written about from a personal perspective by @Sirena Wheeler here, yesterday, on ACEs Connection a piece entitled Erasing My ACEs which @Laura Porter commented upon. I have found tremendous benefit from learning about ACEs...
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Join Me On My Birthday
Join me live on Facebook @GrandfamilyToday Thursday, March 5, 2020, 9 pm EST for my birthday give back: Developing Self-Care Sense
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20 Caregiver Resolutions for 2020
20 Caregiver Resolutions for 2020 Let someone make you a meal at least once a week and that someone can be anyone (including a fast-food chain restaurant Keep a daily Gratitude Journal and start each day with, “ I am grateful that the World has me” Don’t fold any fitted sheets for the entire year, just roll them into a ball Once a month go to a playground with a friend, a neighbor, sibling, spouse, co-worker and ask them to push you on the swing Stay in the shower or tub 5 minutes longer...
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Managing Post-Traumatic Stress in a Pandemic: 3/19 Practices & Resources Update
Are you looking for new ways to get connected, supported, or to manage stress while managing post-traumatic stress during this pandemic? I am. No matter what our past or present life circumstances, it's safe to say a whole bunch of us are feeling more stressed and if we live with chronic post-traumatic stress to begin with, we might be feeling especially vulnerable right now. New Practices & Resources as of 3/19/2020 Ask BR: COVID-19 (Belleruth Naparstek Answering Questions) Bioenergetic...
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My Story about Healing Moving from “What is wrong with me” to “What is happening – how can I take better care of myself?”
When I was a little girl, I had a lot of ear infections. Did anyone else experience that? Every summer in the middle of the fun of swimming in the pool, I would get an ear infection and one year I got one on my birthday. Obviously, I still remember it. It was a sad time. I always felt like I was missing out on things. And it became a pattern. I would go to the doctor and get lamb’s wool and drops put in my ear. It hurt a lot. I can still remember trying to get comfortable lying on the couch...
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New Book: Crazy Was All I Ever Knew By Alice M. Kenny (pseudonym)
To this day, I still think of my childhood home as "the crazy house." Like me, millions of adult Americans are living with the effects of the precarious childhoods they experienced as offspring of mentally ill parents. If you are one of them, you can no doubt relate to my book. As a child, you most likely lived in a crazy house of your own. As an adult, you’ve probably retained and may even relive memories of your tumultuous upbringing. Crazy Was All I Ever Knew combines memoir with...
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Parent Handouts updated and available In Dari, English & Spanish
The updated parent handouts are now available in Spanish as well as English and Dari. Here's the blog post with links to all three versions of each flyer. All versions of the Understanding ACEs and Parenting to Prevent & Heal ACEs parent handouts can be downloaded, distributed, and used freely. Both flyers were made with generous support from Family Hui, a Program of Lead for Tomorrow, who is responsible for making the Spanish and Dari translations available. These are updates of the...
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Resources 4 Resilience (www.r4r.support) & Commentary
We have the best community. And it feels like a community even more right now when things are scary, threatening, and uncertain. Yesterday, Jondi Whitis shared an amazing resource yesterday, by way of a comment, that's great for parents, survivors, providers, and families (all of us). I am making it a blog post in case others missed it or are overwhelmed, as I have been, by sifting through the information coming at us. The home page lets you easily find practices for calming. Here's one...
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Self-Care, Boring Self-Care, And Just Showing Up [laurakhoudari.com]
What Is Self-Care Anyway? I spend a lot of time talking about “self-care,” particularly when I am advising my clients, colleagues, and loved ones to practice it. I tell people to take care of themselves or give specific instruction, to “eat,” “sleep,” or “get outside.” The more I preach the gospel of “self-care,” the more I feel inclined to explore the term itself and its history. Sometimes, what we, or our clients are already doing by “showing up”, is in itself all the self-care that can be...
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Self-Compassion Is Your Perfect Present Guidance, Even In The Most Troubled And Turbulent Of Times.
There is one sure form of guidance you can follow every moment of the day, even in today's most turbulent of times, to ensure that you follow the path in life that is truly right for you, truly good for you. The simple way of describing this form of guidance is: making self-loving or self-compassionate choices for yourself in the present moment . Be guided by your heart-sense regarding your every thought and action . When things don’t turn out the way you want them to, instead of blaming and...
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Tell Me Who You Trust the Most
Imagine that you are being held by someone you love (partner, parent, best friend, someone you once knew, or someone you imagine). You are safe and warm and connected. You feel the soothing of presence - the beating of a primitive language. As you find the rhythms of oneness, you know that all is right. You are protected from whatever unknown lies beyond. Close your eyes and feel the exquisiteness...Now imagine that the exquisiteness fails.
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World Premiere: Stress & Resilience: How Toxic Stress Affects Us, and What We Can Do About It [developingchild.harvard.edu]
By Center on the Developing Child, Harvard University, November 13, 2019 When the stress in your life just doesn’t let up, and it feels like you have no support to get through the day—let alone do everything you need to do to be the best parent you can be—it can seem like there’s nothing that can make it better. But there are resources that can help, and this kind of stress—known as “toxic stress”—doesn’t have to define your life. In this video, learn more about what toxic stress is, how it...
Comment
Re: Toxic Childhood? 5 Spiritual Exercises to Heal the Soul [psychologytoday.com]
Hi Laura, Thanks for sharing this very important article! The mother-daughter relationship is complex, and in many cases informed by the mother's unmet needs, hopes, and aspirations. The unresolved trauma and suffering experienced by a parent will, invariably, shape and inform the trajectory of a child's life. This article allows us to consider, what many might see, as the unthinkable...a mother who does not or cannot provide the love and support that many associate with mother role. I think...
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Re: Toxic Childhood? 5 Spiritual Exercises to Heal the Soul [psychologytoday.com]
Hi, Tosca, Yes, it's an uncomfortable topic for many and it often evokes denial in those who don't wish to face the reality that in many cases, a mother's unmet needs, unaddressed trauma, mental health issues, or other difficulties directly impact her children and often in turn traumatize them. It's taboo in our society (and I'm guessing in many other societies) to view or discuss mothers in any but the most flattering--even idealistic--light. We're not doing anyone any favors or supporting...
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Re: 20 Caregiver Resolutions for 2020
Awesome list. These are great ideas for caregivers, who are under so much stress and often struggle to find time for themselves, but they're really applicable for just about anyone, including those recovering from trauma or those serving trauma survivors. Thanks for sharing this great resource, Cathy!
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Re: 20 Caregiver Resolutions for 2020
Fabulous list! I do a few of these already . . . as I sit here listening to the birds singing happy songs outside my sacred writing space. I will be adding many of these. Thank you! P.S. Sharing this on The Healing Place Podcast FB page , too!
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Re: 3 Ways Healthy Relationships Help Heal Trauma
Hi Robyn! This is a fabulous article! I'd love to interview you for an upcoming mini-course I'm creating.
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Re: 3 Ways Healthy Relationships Help Heal Trauma
Hi Stacy. I am glad you enjoyed my article. I'd love to hear more about you and what you are doing and looking for - why don't you email me at the office directly, robyn@robynbrickel.com and we can email further. Thank you for your interest.
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Re: 3 Ways Healthy Relationships Help Heal Trauma
This was a great read an appreciate the resources.
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After My Wife Died I Was Consumed by Both Grief and Paperwork. We Must Work Together to Change the Medical System [time.com]
By Daniel Jonce Evans, TIME, May 20, 2020 After finding a parking space I stopped and shifted my minivan into park. I sat still for a moment, a moment that allowed me to take a breath in relative silence. Silence, sitting in that driver’s seat, had a particular sound. It encroached after relays clicked and vent fans stopped. The engine crackled while cooling. Still hanging from the ignition, keys on the ring touched once or twice, singing their acknowledgement that their cohort completed the...
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Re: Resilience Is the Goal of Governments and Employers Who Expect People to Endure Crisis [teenvogue.com]
Hi, Jondi. Glad you appreciated this article. It really struck me too. And while I don't follow Teen Vogue (I am neither a teen nor a parent of one), I have been under the impression that at least in the last few years they've been publishing some very respectable journalism, such as this piece. I think they are one to watch, in particular John Patrick Leary.
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My mom asked me to name the top things I wish she would have done better as a parent. My answer might surprise you.
Because I work in the field of child trauma and ACEs science education and prevention here at ACEs Connection, I end up talking about the subject nonstop. I am passionate about this field and making change so I enthusiastically share what I'm reading and learning with everyone who will listen. Those who will listen are often my parents. (This blog, by the way, is a personal piece of writing and does not necessarily reflect the views nor represent ACEs Connection.) I know not everyone's...
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Rebecca Lewis Pankratz: Breaking Generational Poverty, Poverty Circles, & Poverty Programs
"A CEs Connection is the curator of incredible hope, healing and possibility. Parents are not the bad guys. Most of us are just kids with ACEs who grew up..." Rebecca Lewis-Pankratz Last Friday, @Rebecca Lewis-Pankratz joined our A Better Normal series to discuss poverty circles and programs. Rebecca is the Director of Learning Centers as Essdack, as well as a poverty consultant, and we met online, via Twitter (her handle is @pOVERty’s Edge. Rebecca is a brilliant speaker, gifted writer, and...
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Christine (Cissy) White Returns. Hear My Story (www.thetraumatherapistproject.com)
Yesterday, Guy McPherson of the Trauma-Therapist Podcast shared the interview we did a few months ago. It was just after my last round of chemo and though I was tired and pale and my wig kept slipping - and also - I was super excited to be on one of my favorite podcasts and engaged in conversation. Here's an excerpt and the link to the video and audio. I appreciate how often Guy McPherson shares the perspective of trauma survivors with his podcast audience. Here's the link to the Trauma...
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Asking mental health to take a backseat during the coronavirus pandemic is a dangerous proposition
Understanding and limiting the spread of coronavirus has consumed our focus over the past few months. Physical distancing, child care and school closures, the persistence of masks, hand washing, have been essential steps to help protect each of us from the virus. However, this physical distancing has consequences that we need to talk about: isolation, loneliness, boredom, monotony, stress, anxiety, and fear. Mental health often takes a backseat when physical health is at risk. Health is both...
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Coping with Stress During the COVID-19 Pandemic: One-Pager
Coping with Stress During the COVID-19 Pandemic: One-Pager
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Back-to-School in a Pandemic? Questions, Concerns, and Discussion with School Nurse, Robin Cogan
Robin is a brilliant, passionate, and vocal school nurse with almost two decades of experience as a New Jersey school nurse in the Camden City School District. She is the Legislative Co-Chair for the New Jersey State School Nurses Association and she joined us last week for A Better Normal community discussion about back-to-school (or not) plans families are facing this school year. Robin serves as faculty in the School Nurse Certificate Program at Rutgers University-Camden School of Nursing...
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The Healing Place Podcast Interview
Hi Folks, I had the honor of appearing on Teri Wellbrock's, The Healing Place Podcast a few weeks ago. Teri is a gracious host and we had a lot of fun with this show, despite the seriousness of some of the topics. Who doesn't like to chat about the joys of dissociation? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMv9ZMAw_t4 A deep, yet smile-filled conversation with Michael Skinner, musician and trauma advocate. Please join us as we sit down to discuss: * his role as a musician and the importance of...
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Re: The Healing Place Podcast Interview
Michael, It was such a pleasure to finally meet you face-to-face (via Zoom!) and engage in a thought-provoking, heart-touching conversation. Thank you for joining me and sharing your wisdom, insights, and song. Beautiful all the way around. Peace, Teri