My dear friend Kendall Evans lived the later part of her life as an openly transwoman. One of Kendall’s favorite stories was about when she decided to present herself as a woman to the men in domestic violence intervention groups she facilitated. On that day, Kendall put on one of her favorite dresses. It covered the fact she felt apprehensive, anxious, and afraid, yet she generated the courage it took to walk into a room full of men. As she stood before these men, in a sense naked and...

According to Alice Miller author of The Drama of the Gifted Child, an Enlightened Witness is “an understanding person who helps a victim of abuse recognize the injustice they suffered and gives vent to their feelings about what happened to them”. Brene Brown author of Daring Greatly states, "empathy is feeling with or alongside someone, while sympathy is feeling sorry for." https://youtu.be/1Evwgu369Jw In Topeka we unpacked and explored the message of the Enlightened Witnesses in our lives.

I never believed that a man who abuses anyone physically, emotionally or verbally is simply a monster.That's too simple.There is a reason why men do what they do, and don't do and in order to help men and women to not be hurtful to themselves or others we must as I said in my last post ”help them heal.” We must advocate for a world in which we don't punish, we transform. I have always believed this on many issues, from domestic violence to drug addiction to other acts of criminality. We...

We can not solve problems from a distance from ourselves or from each other. The way we muster the courage to heal is to walk the journey together. Any effort to create policy change, structural change, or even programatic change will not succeed unless there is an explicit healing perspective. It begins with a deep understanding that we all come hurt and that those hurts often mean that in striving to relieve our own pain we hurt each other. “Hurt people, hurt people.” It is simplicity on...

I know that I’m not alone in feeling that the work we do is both difficult and yet incredibly fulfilling. It is work that often requires us to navigate across ideological and political lines, across racial and religious lines, through broken systems and a great deal of suffering. It is work that can’t be done alone. Recently a group of education leaders and nationally recognized trauma experts came together in Topeka Kansas exploring a common shared understanding, “that for educators to...

RADICAL GRACE – WHAT I LET GOD SEE AND ACCEPT IN ME ALSO BECOMES WHAT I CAN SEE AND ACCEPT IN MYSELF. AND EVEN MORE, IT BECOMES THAT WHEREBY I SEE EVERYTHING ELSE. ~ RICHARD ROHR For the past three months, I’ve been driving through various parts of Florida witnessing events and gatherings of communities committed to creating safe, loving, trauma informed, and trauma healing spaces. On Friday February 22nd, I was in Tarpon Springs, attending the monthly gathering of Robin Saeger’s...

There are many people who spread information about the science of Adverse Childhood Experiences or ACEs, as defined by ( https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/acestudy/ ), and how it brings light to society’s darkest problems of relationship. When a child suffers trauma, the residual damage often shows up throughout life as the inability to engage in great relationships. Yet, having an ability to enjoy interaction with other humans is everyone’s goal. How can something so simple be so...

To ride a bicycle across the United States—Los Angeles to New Jersey—takes courage, a mission, and stamina. I did it twice. The first trip, during my mid-twenties, was done in hurt and fueled by anger. The second, at age 56, was done in the pursuit of healing self and others by collecting stories of other experiences of trauma and healing, dispensing information about human resilience, and sharing a deep belief in the power all people have to engage with and be enlightened by the process of...

I am James Encinas, an activist, teacher and author of a forthcoming book about healing from Adverse Childhood Experiences: Wheeling to Healing: Broken Heart on a Bicycle . Having experienced domestic abuse as a child, I am working with Futures Without Violence on an important call to action: PLEASE ADD YOUR VOICE… The wound is the place where the Light enters you. ~ Rumi May Rumi’s insight bring you to join a conversation through the power of radio sponsored by Futures Without Violence on...

While in Philadelphia, during a visit to the Curran-Fromhold Correctional Facility,  the Pope shared the following words: “Any society, any family, which cannot share or take seriously the pain of its children, and views that pain as...

With my bicycle ride across the country now over and done with, I found myself in need of a hair cut. So, my feisty 83-year-old mother escorted me to her hair salon to meet her hairdresser, Maria. And so the story begins as some stories do, a...

My mother went into teaching after receiving her bachelors degree at Rutgers University in Camden in 1975. At the time I was a senior at Holy High School in Delran N.J., and remember Camden having its share of poverty, but on this day as I drive...

Photo: Harbor House - room dedicated to meditation and mindfulness practice.   “There are no coincidences in life,” a fact repeatedly reinforced on the journey I’ve undertaken. Continuing the mission of bringing ACE awareness to...

The first time I rode across the country on a bicycle I was in my 20s and trying to figure things out. Upon my arrival at my mom and dad’s home in New Jersey, I was interviewed by the local paper and was quoted as saying, “I thought a lot...

Yesterday I stopped to take a picture of a sign marking the site of the most active slave market in the south. The sign stands on the corner of Royal St. and St. Louis St. in the old historic district of Mobile, Alabama. When I got back to the Quality...

When riding long distances you get into a rhythm, put your head down, pedal forward and focus on the road ahead, often missing the landscape that surrounds you. So I know that it was serendipity that made me look up and notice the juvenile detention...

Dr. Vincent Fellitti enlightens us to the fact that ACE goes unrecognized because for many of us our adverse childhood experiences are lost in time and protected by shame, by secrecy, and by social taboos against routinely exploring certain realms of...

Picture of "Little Red School House" I passed along the road. My route took me through Phoenix, Arizona and I had the great fortune and pleasure to meet with some of the staff of Eight Educational Outreach - Kimberly Flack (General Manager of...

Cycling through Oxnard, CA, I got my second flat. Luckily for me it was just as I was approaching A Street in downtown Oxnard where the town square is located. Across the plaza, I spotted a Starbucks and walked my bike over. Parking the bike at an...

I want to tell you about Cherokee Point Elementary, my visit there and a best practices school model that I witnessed in action and strongly believe should be copied and emulated nationally. [At left: Principal Godwin Higa and Cherokee Point Elementary feed the community.] Cherokee does not talk about the importance of community/school engagement; it lives it. Our children learn more through what they see modeled than from what they hear or are told! Every other Friday, the school...

On Saturday morning, April 26, I attended a conference sponsored by the Rand Corporation on the release of The City of Santa Monica 2014 Youth Wellbeing Report Card . The purpose of the report card is to track how the school aged children are doing in...

A couple of weeks ago at an “Everyday Courage” event sponsored by the California Endowment I met a very caring and compassionate woman named Rosa Arevalo. Rosa works for CASA of Los Angeles a non-profit organization that recruits, trains,...

Arrived at Le Grand High School on Friday April 18 th at noon, bicycle in tow. The front office staff cordially greeted me and walked me over to Principal Javier Martinez. After a warm handshake and short debrief he marched me over to show me the...

I believe that ending violence requires more than the use of our resources to minimizing the harmful impacts of violence. I believe that there must be a step beyond taking on violence to avert deaths. We need a long-term vision to guide our projects...

Recently I volunteered at the two-day, Changing the Paradigm-Trauma and the Developing Child conference, hosted by Echo Parenting & Education. This organization envisions a world of non-violence in which adults respect children by ensuring their right to emotional and physical safety. On day one of the conference, during her keynote speech, Echos founder Ruth Beaglehole, asked: What action are you willing to take to make this world non-violent? I...

One of my first memories was being awaken by the car horn before the crack of dawn.   I remember slowly making my way down the hallway to the stairs and cautiously beginning my descent as my mother, unaware that she was being followed, opened...