Guidance for supporting children to tell their stories so they tell it all for us all

I have supported several young adults who have experienced extensive trauma. One experienced labor trafficking.   I am finding that first we need to educate our children on what trauma is, and how it affects them.  We aren't there yet, at least in Missouri (and that goes for people with disabilities as well).  Then, I find it takes at least five years for them to find their own voices to be able to share what happened to them, if ever outside of a trusted relationship.  They need to be safe before they can do that (and of course their definition of safe is  not mine).   Many give me permission to share their stories in the mean time as they want them told, they just can't do it yet.   I do it only with permission, and using a pseudonym.   A podcast using a pseudonym would let them speak in a safe environment while remaining anonymous.   I am looking at this too, as people want lived experience.  But, for anyone who has experienced trauma having to tell the story over and over re-traumatizes them.  Advocacy can be done without the person sharing details in many situations.

I appreciate and understand your desire for those who have experienced trauma to have a voice, but research shows that doesn’t need to entail telling details of past trauma. Best practice strongly suggests that sharing personal stories of trauma—resolved or unresolved —has shown to re-traumatize both the teller and the audience. The telling of and listening to stories happens best in trusted relationships, including therapeutic relationships, where one would not be at risk of exploitation.  We know the stories, we know the impact of trauma, we know how trauma can be healed—only in the context of trusting relationships.  We know what we need to do policy-wise to address trauma and we know what to do to create a path to healing.  We deliver Trust Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) the international model of care developed at the Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development at Texas Christian University that has amazing results in helping folks heal. Through sharing concepts from the neurobiology of attachment, healthy child development,  and the principles of Connection, Empowering and Correcting, and practicing strategies to build trusting relationships, participants can intake these concepts and strategies in an emotionally safe setting.  Learning healthy boundaries and gaining a voice, but not needing to share details you may not want to is healing.